Nessie's best friend

C - I watched footage of mermaids. I can't believe they're real!



D - They're not.



C - It was very realistic CGI if it wasn't real.



D - It wasn't real.



C - They're like a cross between an alien and a fish!



D - No, they're not.

Or the next Eyensteyen

(When being congratulated on high grades)



Imagen if u [father] would of been cleaver. I may of been the next Harkins.

If you know what I mean

(When discussing the differences in water around the country.)



K - They have soft water up here, right?





D - Yeah, it's hard down south.



(K and D were giggling like children.)

If they're fans of SG1

(When watching Stargate: SG1.)



I wonder if they used the real Area 51. That would be cool.

Can anyone translate?

C - I used to have a go at you for ejecting my butt.



M - What?



C - For taking my games out of my PlayStation.



M - ...what?

Genuine pasta is made from the tears of children

(When eating a meal of pasta in tomato sauce.)



You can really tell the difference between real pasta and fake pasta.

Cloning adverts

(When watching the film Paul. Paul is an alien and is discussing why he wants to leave - they want to study him by taking stemcells.)



K - You can get stemcells from things like umbilical cords. Can they get them from Paul?





C - From billboards?



(We're hoping it was a misheard line.)

Nearly as scary as rubber ducks

(When watching Balls of Steel. Actors trick members of the public and do stunts. In this stunt, one man is going to dive into a 'pool of piranhas', but misses and falls into a fire, and jumps into the pool to put out the fire. The 'pool of piranhas' is a paddling pool, and the piranhas are obviously plastic toys.)




C - Would piranhas eat humans?


***


C - Are those real piranhas?

When a mummy and daddy love each other very much...

(When reading film trivia.)



D - In Jurassic park there's a sign early on that the dinosaurs can reproduce. Sam Neill on the helicopter has the two female ends of a seatbelt, and combines them to make a belt. Like two females reproducing.




C - So the dinosaurs are lesbians?





D - No. They reproduce. Like a man and a woman





C - I don't get it.




D - Two females make babies by becoming a mum and dad.




C - Ohhhh. Oh I get it now.