(When discussing bus passes.)
How old do you have to be to catch a bus?
My flatmate, who isn't known for being world-wise, has a habit of saying things without questioning what is being said. These are one-liners, conversations and guest posts from readers.
Saturday, 31 May 2014
Wednesday, 28 May 2014
That does sum them up
C - What are obituaries?
D - Notifications about the dead. They print them in newspapers with a tiny biography.
C - Dead people adverts?
D - Notifications about the dead. They print them in newspapers with a tiny biography.
C - Dead people adverts?
Sunday, 25 May 2014
It's a hermaphrodite free area
I'm going to make new friends. They either have to be male or female.
Thursday, 22 May 2014
It's a depressing outlook
(When watching Catchphrase - a gameshow where contestants look at animations and guess at what the catchphrase or quote is that they represent.)
C - When one door opens, another one closes!
M - No, it's the other way round.
C - Why?
M - Because it's about new opportunities.
C - Yeah. And doors closing are good.
C - When one door opens, another one closes!
M - No, it's the other way round.
C - Why?
M - Because it's about new opportunities.
C - Yeah. And doors closing are good.
Monday, 19 May 2014
They don't rhyme in English, either
(During the introduction to an episode of FMA: Brotherhood, a Japanese anime series.)
C - Do you think this song rhymes in Japanese?
M - Well, listen to it and see if it rhymes.
C - But this is the English version. We don't know how it sounds in Japanese.
D - But it's the same theme music.
C - But it would sound different to the Japanese.
D - Well, yes, because they know what it translates into.
C - Exactly. It might rhyme in Japanese.
M - I've been listening. This one doesn't rhyme.
C - But it might in Japanese!
C - Do you think this song rhymes in Japanese?
M - Well, listen to it and see if it rhymes.
C - But this is the English version. We don't know how it sounds in Japanese.
D - But it's the same theme music.
C - But it would sound different to the Japanese.
D - Well, yes, because they know what it translates into.
C - Exactly. It might rhyme in Japanese.
M - I've been listening. This one doesn't rhyme.
C - But it might in Japanese!
Friday, 16 May 2014
Well, he is getting on a bit now
(When looking at a Where's Wally? picture - a large, complex image where you look for certain people and items. Note: In the UK "Where's Waldo?" is called "Where's Wally?")
Wally has a cane? How long has he been crippled for? When I was little he could walk.
Wally has a cane? How long has he been crippled for? When I was little he could walk.
Tuesday, 13 May 2014
Saturday, 10 May 2014
*Sniff* It's just so emotional. The way the smoke flowed between the blades of grass. It's so beautiful
What is tear gas? Does it make stuff get torn up?
Wednesday, 7 May 2014
Quote from a different flatmate
(An appeal advert comes on - no one is fully paying attention to it)
TV - Amena would ask you to save her life. But she can't.
D - Because she's dead.
M - Dude, that's harsh.
D - Huh? (Looks up). I thought it was an advert about donkeys. My bad.
TV - Amena would ask you to save her life. But she can't.
D - Because she's dead.
M - Dude, that's harsh.
D - Huh? (Looks up). I thought it was an advert about donkeys. My bad.
Sunday, 4 May 2014
That's speciesist
(When watching You've Been Framed - someone is poking a live scallop to make it snap shut)
C - Is that real?
D - Yes.
C - It's a living thing, right? How can a rock be alive?
C - Is that real?
D - Yes.
C - It's a living thing, right? How can a rock be alive?
Thursday, 1 May 2014
It's funny because there were like, words in a structured way
D - (reading) "I'm pretty sure Community is one of the first sitcoms to pull off a complete twenty minute 8-bit episode. Then again, they're most likely the only sitcom to actually do this". M, can you think of any other series that have ever done that?
M - An episode in eight sections?
D - No, as in the old computer game style.
C - (Laughs until she weeps) I don't know what that means, but it sounded funny.
M - An episode in eight sections?
D - No, as in the old computer game style.
C - (Laughs until she weeps) I don't know what that means, but it sounded funny.
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